Anyone who lives in New York and rides the subway has inevitably run into “The Sandwich Guy” on the train. He always makes a grand entrance and carries a large bag with him that he explains is full of food for anyone who needs it. He claims to work for a “charity” that does not receive any government funding, so they rely solely on the donations of others. I had a pretty awesome encounter with one of these guys on the train the other day and I must share.
So, this particular sandwich guy took his position in the center of the train and began his speech. He rambled on and on about how he used to live on the streets and then he found some church that helped him, so now he works with them to help other homeless people. He’s wearing a makeshift ID badge around his neck that has a very generic name and logo on it…I think it said something like “NYC Hope”. He explains to us how unsafe the streets are these days because “thugs” go around setting homeless people on fire and beating the crap out of them. But thanks to his organization, now you can find them sleeping safely and soundly on park benches. Gee, thanks for making park benches safe again…sounds like we’re really on our way to solving the problem of homelessness in NYC. He goes on to say that one of the things they do is provide food for anyone who is hungry. He has a large nylon bag filled with “sandwiches, water and milk” and anyone who wants the food is welcome to it. At this point, I’m thinking “Milk??” How long has he been carrying that unrefrigerated milk around?? He ends by walking up and down the train with a can, soliciting donations. And he always says the same thing, “God bless the ones that give. God bless the ones that don’t.” I suppose that’s a nice gesture. It certainly doesn’t encourage me to give. I think, “God bless the ones that give and the rest of you are going to hell,” might be a better approach. But I guess his way works.
As he’s making his rounds, something I had never seen before happened. A woman, who looked like she was going through some bad times, asked him for a sandwich. Now, in all the times I’ve witnessed this scam, I have never seen anyone ask for food. So, now I’m like…yeah! Let’s see what you have in that bag. I have to say, he looked less than thrilled that this woman asked for a sandwich. Seriously, WTF? That’s his whole deal…food for anyone who wants it. He rifles through his bag for a long while and places a sandwich and an orange in a separate plastic bag. Then asks the woman if she wants milk or water. Choose the water…choose the water, please choose the water. She replies with a fervent “Milk!” Oh my god! She picked the milk! So, he places the milk in the bag and hands the bag full o’ food to the woman. And then he disappeared. Just like that.
The woman reaches into the bag and pulls out the sandwich. It’s a pre-packaged egg salad sandwich that that you’d buy at a 7-11 or something. Great…egg salad and milk that’s been sitting in a warm bag for who knows how long…bon appetite! The sandwich is completely squashed and the woman looks at it with absolute disgust. She throws it back into the bag and pulls out her little carton of milk. She looks at the milk and declares, “What? They ain’t got no low-fat milk?”
And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why people don’t give to charity. There’s just no appreciation for genrosity anymore.
